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An Edgy Alternative to Date Night

6/15/2018

by Jenny Arrington

Applause erupted as an earnest couple pressed the pads of their feet together and pushed. They had reached the full expression of their partner version of Upavistha Konasana, all four legs straight as they held hands and balanced on their sitz bones. The other couples in the room clapped and smiled with the compassion of those who had just moments earlier wondered if they would figure out what looked and felt like a very challenging position. Six couples in the cozy loft at Urban Yoga Chicago were embarking on a Couples Yoga workshop.

This partner pose was a perfect metaphor for relationship challenges. In a committed relationship we can find ourselves in scenarios that feel uncomfortable, challenging, and seemingly impossible to overcome. In Couples Yoga these scenarios are recreated in a supportive, calm environment. I share cues to help the couple achieve poses safely, while encouraging their communication. Some of these partner poses feel insurmountable at first and people think they aren’t strong or flexible enough to do them. Their first perceptions are deceiving though because it doesn’t take brute strength or an advanced yoga practice to achieve these shapes. The key is clear communication and working together. Every time, without fail, the couples delight in what they’ve achieved after a little bit of patient communication, along with some trial and error.

Along with overcoming challenges, couples will get to explore the edges of their comfort zones in a safe, controlled environment. Fear is the catalyst for most interpersonal conflict. Our brain is wired to pay attention to fear so whenever there is a perceived threat, we often let our thoughts run away in a storm of negative thoughts. With couples, the fears generally hover around finances, sex, desire, jealousy, and power differentials. Couples Yoga allows couples to be in a safe environment while experiencing small doses of fear. I’m right there to help guide participants to the edge of their comfort zone so they can experience sitting with that little bit of fear and working with their partner to move through it.

Erin Miller shared her experience in the workshop, “Couples yoga was a wonderful way to introduce my partner to yoga and my studio. We learned exercises that allowed us to be part of and assist in one another’s yoga experience. Working through those challenges together was transformative!”

Savitree Kaur also shared her experience. “I went in tentative, unsure if I would become irritated, or if this would actually be fun for both of us. It was soooo much fun. This was a fantastic option away from the typical dinner and movie that we could do together that elevated our sense of togetherness, strategy, partnership and playfulness. It was another way to get to know each other physically and as a couple in a setting where we are both equally responsible for the experience we have. And while that may be true with everything in life, you get to see it unfold immediately, right in front of you.”

Everyone’s comfort zone has different parameters and different triggers. Some participants may feel some discomfort or embarrassment with the shared mouth-to-mouth breath work we do. Others may be pushed to their edge by the chanting or the poses. We want to trigger a little healthy discomfort so the couples get to practice how to help each other. In this environment, there’s always victory. There is enough time and support so nobody is left sitting alone with their fear. There are always spontaneous hugs, kisses, and snuggles throughout the workshop. These are unambiguous testimonies of success and connection.

Yoga is about the union of the body, mind, and spirit. A couple who practices yoga together puts themself on fertile ground to continue the growth of their union.

“Don’t live with each other, but for each other. Hold an attitude of gratitude.”
- Yogi Bhajan

Couples Yoga returns Sunday, June 24 1:30-3:30pm.
The price increases June 16.. Space is limited, register today!

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How we connect with Anthony Bourdain

6/8/2018

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by Jodh Kaur

Sat Nam,
I remember reading Kitchen Confidential around the time I began taking Kundalini Yoga. At the time I was a stressed out Crisis Social Worker and I was searching for more out of life. The stress brought me to Kundalini Yoga, the search brought me to food. Problem was, I was terrible in the kitchen!

When I started dating my husband, I had visions of myself in the kitchen whipping up these beautiful, delicious meals - but they never turned out according to my vision. Then I read Kitchen Confidential, by Anthony Bourdain, and fell in love with the story he told. His writing style, his truth - it all seemed like such an adventure. I wondered how could I improve my skills and could I possibly even learn to cook for others? I began watching his shows and other cooking shows, reading cookbooks, learning more about cooking and practicing (lots of practicing).

After class one day, I shared my interest in cooking with Savitree who happened to know a chef and she connected the two of us. Chef Joshua was a private chef for a family in Chicago and he invited me to spend Fridayafternoons with him each week. He would cook, I would observe, write down his recipes and take photos. It allowed me to understand and experience cooking in a loving and organic way. Experimenting with different flavors, colors, textures, trying new foods and combinations. And now, after years of practicing, making mistakes, figuring things out - I can say I love to cook (and I’m pretty good at it too). I’m grateful at the opportunity to be able to cook healthy, delicious food for my family and community and hopefully be an inspiration for others in the kitchen too.

Anthony Bourdain allowed me to see a chef as a real, accessible person and made cooking and food an adventure. He inspired me to be adventurous and to experience new foods and cultural cuisines when traveling, adding a whole new element to our travels.

This morning when I learned of Anthony Bourdain’s suicide, I broke down. My heart breaks at the pain he must have been in and for the pain his family is experiencing. My heart goes out to anyone who is living with depression, it is a cold and lonely place to be. While we know about the public figures we have lost this year, my guess is many in of you have been affected by suicide at some point in your life. According to the Centers for Disease Control, the suicide rate in the US has increased 25% since 1999 and middle aged adults have seen the highest increase.

I invite you talk about mental illness and suicide. In fact, talking about suicide does not give someone the idea to kill themselves. Addressing suicide, asking about it, can actually open the door to a conversation and allow one to get help. Let’s check in with each other. If you know someone who struggles with depression please reach out to them. In fact, reach out to the strong person you know who is always there for others - they may need to talk too.

Most importantly, please know you are not alone. If you are reading this email, you are part of a community that loves and cares for you. If you are feeling lonely, scared or lost, please connect with us or someone you know. Connection and community are key to our mental, emotional, spiritual and physical health and well being. We live an a chaotic and confusing time. It is easy to be isolated. It is easy to lose ourselves in our phones and in the busy-ness of life. It can be really scary to sit down on the mat and spend 3 to 11 minutes alone with ourselves. You are not alone with your fears. I think we have all been in a dark, lonely, scary place - I know I have. Connecting with others is how we gain support and encouragement through times of difficulty. Connecting with community is how we know we are not alone, we are connected, loved and part of something.

We love you and we are here for you.
If you need help, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255.

With all my love,
Jodh

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An Edgy Alternative to Date Night

How we connect with Anthony Bourdain

by Jodh Kaur

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An Edgy Alternative to Date Night

How we connect with Anthony Bourdain

by Jodh Kaur​

Categories

Archives

Favorite Links

Kundalini Yoga Quotes:

by Jodh Kaur